My,
oh my, was 2014 one for the books. It was certainly a trying year. But it was
also the year where God's presence permeated my heart like never before.
I
learned so much about the character of God and who He has called me to
be.
I learned that I have a propensity to idealize others in my
interpersonal relationships. I also have a tendency to view a person not in
light of who they are, but who they are capable of becoming. While this mindset
can be beneficial if the other person is truly interested in making changes
that support and foster his/her own emotional and spiritual growth, it can also
lead to unnecessary angst and hurt, if they do not have the desire to change. Hence,
I've learned that while I am called to support my interpersonal relationships
through encouragement and prayer, it is my obligation to myself to be realistic
about another's capacity and willingness to develop his/her emotional and
spiritual world.
Along this vein, I've learned I can no longer place expectations on
other people. People, at their root are emotionally unpredictable
& often times their words & actions do not align. I’ve learned to not
take the inconsistencies of people personally. It’s a reflection of who
they are as a person, not who I am. I am
called to place my hope and expectation on God, not man. (Psalm 118:8)
I
learned that God offers us common sense & discernment (Proverbs 3:21) but
it is up to us to use these gifts accordingly. We can choose to be filled with the
Holy Spirit and His wisdom, or we can willingly choose instead to follow
our faulty hearts. One leads to a life
filled with peace and joy; another, of anxiety, neglect, and fear.
I
learned that you outgrow people, much like you outgrow a pair of pants. You can
attempt to force your legs into the pants, but eventually they will rip at the
seams. It is the same with
relationships. It is far better to
invest in a new pair of pants and relationship than to wear tattered pants and
stay in a dysfunctional relationship. (1
Corinthians 13:11).
I
learned that when you’re an optimist, and plans or relationships cease to work
out like you imagined them to, it’s not the plan or person that causes you
grief and disappointment, it’s the expectation you placed on that plan or
person. It’s the cold hard reality that
a dream you once held near and dear to your heart has died. It is through those
disappointments and rejection, I have learned once again, that I can only place
my expectations on God, not my own plans or other people. He alone does not
disappoint. His plans for my life far
outweigh the limited expectations I have placed on my life. (Romans 8:28).
I
learned that time alone does not heal all wounds. Father God, plus His timing, heals
all wounds. (Psalm 147:3).
I
learned that the best type of friend is a praying one.
I
learned my capacity to love and forgive is so much stronger than I ever
imagined, and I attribute this solely to God’s grace. (Matthew
18: 21-22).
I
truly learned to be fervent in prayer (1
Thessalonians 5:17) and while there are times I struggle with relinquishing autonomy
to God concerning His will for my life, I am not nearly as stubborn as I once
was was. I am His work in progress, and
I truly believe that He directs my steps and delights in every detail of my
life (Psalm
37:23).
And
finally, I have learned that when God makes a promise to you, He fulfills that
promise (Joshua 21: 45). Nothing can
hinder this promise—not time, not circumstances, not people. It shall be fulfilled. However, it may not look exactly the way you envisoned
it to be.
