Commited

This is the first year I've decided to forgo making New Years resolutions. The idea is nice, but not very realistic. Why make promises you can't keep? That all or nothing mentality generally doesn't work for most people, myself included. So instead of making broken promises to myself, I've simply decided to make commitments to myself.

1.) The first commitment I'm making to myself is living a more balanced & peaceful life. I'm a type a personality but I'm making it my mission to become a more patient woman who lives in the "now" instead of always fantasizing about the future. And in line with that, I will no longer get anxious/fearful about the "unknowns" of life. I will embrace the uncertainties & learn to fall in love with all of the possibilities & potentials that God has in store for me.

2.) Second, I will get to know the heart of God more. I will join a bible study & do my best to get in His word everyday.

3.) Third & the most important commitment I'm making is to bring someone to The Lord. As someone who wasn't raised in a traditional Christian home & was saved in college with the help of a great group of friends who made it their mission to make Christ known, I know firsthand the importance of reaching out to people & offering them hope. This hope is found in Jesus. "Know Jesus, know peace. No Jesus, no peace."

4.) Another commitment I'm making is to extend my hand & heart to every one I come across, especially those who society labels outcasts. On church on Sunday, we had a wonderful guest speaker & He explained how God used him as a means to bring a neighbor of his who was a former marine; suffered from schizophrenia & PTSD; & used hardcore narcotics, to the Lord. Instead of placing judgement on these individuals & being "scared" of them, I will get in the habit of being comfortable with uncomfortable situations. In fact, I will place myself in uncomfortable situations whenever possible, so I can let the presence of God be known.

5.) And finally, the last of my most important commitments is to not be so flaky. A dear friend of mine called me out on this today. I have a terrible habit of making plans & then the day of, canceling on that person. To her, the act of canceling is synonymous with not caring about her and/or not respecting her time. This couldn't be further from the truth. I value all of my relationships, even though my conduct may appear otherwise contradictory.

The act of last minute cancellations raises two questions: why say yes in the first place?  I say yes because at that particular time when we talk about getting together, I genuinely want to hang out with that person.  I find myself often times making plans ahead of time, but in the back of my head, going, I'll probably just want to stay at home than go out when that day arrives.  But instead of being upfront with my friend, I make plans because I feel like if I say no to a friend the act of saying no to hanging out will make her feel like I don't care about her which isn't the case at all!!!  (I talk about my reasoning behind canceling plans in the next paragraph).  The irony is the person who I make plans with will be hurt much worse by my acceptance of an invitation to hang out, and then canceling at the last minute on her than she would if I politely declined in the first hand.  

The second question that needs to be addressed is once you do make set plans, why don't you honor the commitment you made to your friend & get together? It's because I simply don't feel up to it most of the time. I'm a homebody & after a long day, I just feel like sitting on my bum. I don't feel like getting dressed up & would rather relax by watching a movie on tv & enjoying a home cooked meal with a friend.  And that's hard to do because I'm living at home right now, so inviting people isn't really much of an option right now. Lame excuse, I know.  Lame.  Lame! The funny thing is though when I do venture out for a night on the town with a friend or group of friends, I find myself thinking I need to do this more enough. I need to spend time in good company & not be such a hermit. I'm 25 & lead my life like a lil old grandma most of the time. 

So, I'm making a commitment that I will only make plans that I will follow through on.  Instead of making plans way in advance, I will resort to making plans on the day of.  Yes, there are certain occasions that call for advanced planning, like a road trip, but for the most part I will make it a habit to plan spontaneous get-togethers.

This is an especially important commitment of mine because I want to be known as a reliable friend in all aspects of my life. I don't want to be known as the friend who is just reliable for times that warrant emotional support, encouragement or when crises arise. I mean shouldn't there be a direct correlation between a friend who offers emotional support & showing up for a scheduled dinner date? I believe so, and will make sure that I am no longer an outlier when it comes to that.

Other resolutions include:
-Not spending so much time on Facebook
-Expanding my knowledge of nutrition, strength/conditioning & biomechanics...maybe this will be the year that I study to become a CSCS (certified strength & conditioning specialist)
-Receiving all a's in my science courses
-Being accepted into the nursing schools I apply to
-Volunteering at the local children's hospital
-Traveling across the us to see friends I haven't seen in a long time
-Having scheduled daddy/daughter dates
-Getting back into running. I want to be able to run 6 minute miles
-Getting stronger. I want to be able to squat & deadlift twice my bw & be able to rep out strict pull-ups as well as pistol squats.
-Say thank you more
-Drink more water
-Learn how to cook more healthy dishes & experiment more in the kitchen

-Get to bed at a decent hour.  Going to bed at 2 isn't cutting it.  I won't to become the early bird I was in high school.